5 Days…(this post lacks humor)

Until I find out if I can move on with my life. I spent most of Dec., Jan., & Feb. doing the application process for the internship. It’s a centralized process, meaning you send most of your materials to one place, but it was still pretty lengthy. I had to have 4 (!!) transcripts sent, redo my resume, write many different essays, etc. etc. ETC. Then March was interviews. I applied to a few different schools and spent well over $600. Sigh.

The internship would start late August, which is right around the time we’d have to move too. Yet, we have no idea where we can/have to move to. I’ve tried not to think about it but I do and then I can feel the chemicals rush under my chest. I’ve turned our lives upside down for this, moved us north, quit my job – could have bought a house by now, and it all comes down to Sunday at 7 pm. The odds are not in my favor so I sort of have to prepare myself NOT to get an internship. For example, I know that around 110 people applied to my top internship choice, yet only 11 will be accepted. And the numbers only go up from there. Competitive.

And a lot of people are like, oh, well, you applied to a few places so you’ll get accepted to at least one. No, that’s not how it works. You rank the programs, and they rank you, so you can only be accepted into one because sooo many people are applying. Isn’t it ridiculous though? So many people suffering from food-related illnesses, yet, we’re desperately competing to become dietitians. And what ticks me off most is that a) they don’t tell you this before you even enter the program and b) there are no articles about this. None. I’ve searched high and low for some statistics to help in my ranking process.

Sunday will be horrible during the day. I just know I’ll hurl or something. If I don’t get one I’ll be crushed of course, but I’ll have time to make some money for the next round of applications (which, by the way, isn’t for a year. Yeah, how crazy is this process? I don’t have a year!) I can either move up to part or full time at the hospital or become a DTR. I’ll also have time to catch up on all those projects I’ve wanted to do and volunteer work. AND….the best part is Shane and I will be able to go on a nice honeymoon. :)

One thing I’ve learned from this process is that I’m a good writer and I should use that tool more often. I’ve gotten many compliments on my essay. Any time there’s a writing contest, scholarship with essay, etc., I’m going to apply. It’s one of my best assets.

And I’ve come a long way since undergrad 10 years ago. I was trying to apply to ivy league grad schools for an MFA but stopped half way through because I was convinced they’d just look at my name and know I wasn’t good enough. This time, I did experience friction, but I know that I put in a great effort, the odds are just not in my favor. And I have another chance in a year.

Sundaysundaysundaysunday. Coincidentally, also April Fool’s Day. So wish me luck..orrrr…give me suggestions on some nice honeymoon spots. :) Thank you.